So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
