It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
false alarm, still single
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