Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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