i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize