i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
