If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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