People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Ketchup is God's man juice
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
