I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize