I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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