:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
