Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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