Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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