Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
