I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival