Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
