Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
