Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
