Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother