I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize
