Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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