open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize