Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
