Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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