Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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