So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
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