i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize