TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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