Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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