eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He? As in you personified your dick?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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