Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
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I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
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Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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