I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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