Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
