But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Randomize
