half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
