As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
