still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
