ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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