WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
