HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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