Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
there is glitter all over my balls
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
