he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
All I want is dick and wine.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
