As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
