my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
