i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
