I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
