Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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