"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
