Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
