I want to walk on stilts...naked
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
