She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
