So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
