I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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